Deuteronomy 25:7-12: a reflection

7If the man doesn’t want to take his brother’s wife, then his brother’s wife shall go up to the gate to the elders, and say, “My husband’s brother refuses to raise up to his brother a name in Israel. He will not perform the duty of a husband’s brother to me.” 8Then the elders of his city shall call him, and speak to him. If he stands and says, “I don’t want to take her,” 9then his brother’s wife shall come to him in the presence of the elders, and loose his sandal from off his foot, and spit in his face. She shall answer and say, “So shall it be done to the man who does not build up his brother’s house.” 10His name shall be called in Israel, “The house of him who had his sandal removed.” 11When men strive against each other, and the wife of one draws near to deliver her husband out of the hand of him who strikes him, and puts out her hand, and grabs him by his private parts, 12then you shall cut off her hand. Your eye shall have no pity.

Among these laws is one about the duty to care for and build up one's brother's house. If a man died childless, his brother was to marry the widow and raise up a son to carry on the brother's name; and if he refused this duty, he was publicly shamed as the one who would not build up his brother's house. Behind the particular custom lies a principle: that we have a responsibility to care for and build up others, especially our own kin, and that shirking this duty is a real failure.

Notice the principle beneath the custom: the responsibility to care for and build up others, and the shame of refusing it. The brother was to build up his brother's house, to take responsibility for the widow and the family's continuance; and to refuse this duty was a public disgrace. The custom took seriously the responsibility we have toward others, especially our own family, to care for them and build them up rather than leaving them to their loss. To shirk that responsibility, to refuse to build up when it was ours to do, was a real and shameful failure. Caring for and building up others was a duty, not an option.

That principle is worth taking to heart, for we too have responsibilities to care for and build up others, and can be tempted to shirk them. We have duties toward others, especially our own family and those close to us, to care for them, to build them up, to take responsibility for their good; and we can be tempted to shirk these duties, to leave others to their loss rather than doing our part. But the custom shamed the one who would not build up his brother's house. Do not shirk your responsibility to care for and build up others, leaving them to their loss when it is yours to help; take up the duty of caring for and building up those you are responsible for, especially your own, rather than refusing it, as the man who would not build up his brother's house was shamed. Take seriously your responsibility to build up others, doing your part rather than shirking it.

Lord, among these laws is one about the duty to care for and build up one's brother's house. If a man died childless, his brother was to marry the widow and raise up a son to carry on the brother's name; and if he refused this duty, he was publicly shamed as the one who would not build up his brother's house. Behind the particular custom lies a principle: that we have a responsibility to care for and build up others, especially our own kin, and that shirking this duty is a real failure. Show me the principle beneath the custom: the responsibility to care for and build up others, and the shame of refusing it. The brother was to build up his brother's house, to take responsibility for the widow and the family's continuance; and to refuse this duty was a disgrace. The custom took seriously the responsibility we have toward others, especially our own family. To shirk that responsibility was a real and shameful failure. Take that principle to my heart, for I too have responsibilities to care for and build up others, and can be tempted to shirk them. I have duties toward others, especially my own family and those close to me, to care for them and build them up; and I can be tempted to shirk these duties, to leave others to their loss rather than doing my part. Keep me from shirking my responsibility to care for and build up others, leaving them to their loss when it is mine to help; help me take up the duty of caring for and building up those I am responsible for, Lord, rather than refusing it. Help me take seriously my responsibility to build up others, doing my part.