Job 19:1-16: a reflection

1Then Job answered, 2“How long will you torment me, and crush me with words? 3You have reproached me ten times. You aren’t ashamed that you attack me. 4If it is true that I have erred, my error remains with myself. 5If indeed you will magnify yourselves against me, and plead against me my reproach, 6know now that God has subverted me, and has surrounded me with his net. 7“Behold, I cry out of wrong, but I am not heard. I cry for help, but there is no justice. 8He has walled up my way so that I can’t pass, and has set darkness in my paths. 9He has stripped me of my glory, and taken the crown from my head. 10He has broken me down on every side, and I am gone. He has plucked my hope up like a tree. 11He has also kindled his wrath against me. He counts me among his adversaries. 12His troops come on together, build a siege ramp against me, and encamp around my tent. 13“He has put my brothers far from me. My acquaintances are wholly estranged from me. 14My relatives have gone away. My familiar friends have forgotten me. 15Those who dwell in my house and my maids consider me a stranger. I am an alien in their sight. 16I call to my servant, and he gives me no answer. I beg him with my mouth.

In the depths of his suffering, Job speaks of a loneliness that cuts as deep as any of his losses: he feels abandoned, not only by God, but by everyone around him. He has put my brothers far from me, Job cries; my acquaintances are wholly estranged from me. My relatives have gone away. My familiar friends have forgotten me. Even his servants no longer answer him; he has become a stranger in his own house. On top of his losses and his pain, Job bears the crushing loneliness of feeling forsaken, deserted by those closest to him, and, in his anguish, forsaken even by God. This is one of the sharpest edges of suffering: the loneliness of feeling abandoned, cut off, forgotten, when we most need companionship and comfort. Job speaks the raw truth of that isolation, holding nothing back.

Notice the loneliness Job names: he feels abandoned by everyone, and even by God. It is not only his losses and his pain that crush him; it is the isolation, the sense of being deserted, estranged from brothers and friends and relatives, a stranger even in his own house. Suffering often brings this loneliness; those in deep pain can feel cut off, forgotten, abandoned, even by God. Job does not hide this raw feeling; he speaks it plainly, the anguish of feeling forsaken. Yet Job's feeling of God's abandonment, real as it was to him, was not the final truth; God had not in fact abandoned him, and would answer him in the end. The feeling of being forsaken is one of suffering's sharpest pains, but the feeling is not always the truth; God is often nearest when we feel most alone. Even in the loneliness of suffering, God has not left us.

That is worth holding onto, for even in the loneliness of suffering, when we feel forsaken by all, God has not abandoned us. When we suffer, we can feel the crushing loneliness Job felt, deserted by those around us, forgotten, and even, in our anguish, forsaken by God; and the feeling is real and painful. But the feeling of God's abandonment is not always the truth; God is often nearest when we feel most alone, and he does not finally forsake his own. When you feel the loneliness of suffering, forsaken by all and even by God, hold onto the truth that God has not abandoned you, however it feels. Hold onto the truth that God has not abandoned you even in the loneliness of suffering, when you feel forsaken by everyone and even by God, as Job cried that his friends and relatives had forgotten him and he felt forsaken; for the loneliness of feeling abandoned is one of suffering's sharpest pains, but the feeling is not always the truth, and God is often nearest when we feel most alone, not finally forsaking his own however forsaken they feel.

Lord, in the depths of his suffering, Job speaks of a loneliness that cuts as deep as any of his losses: he feels abandoned, not only by you, but by everyone around him. He has put my brothers far from me, Job cries; my acquaintances are wholly estranged from me; my relatives have gone away; my familiar friends have forgotten me. Even his servants no longer answer him; he has become a stranger in his own house. On top of his losses and his pain, Job bears the crushing loneliness of feeling forsaken, and, in his anguish, forsaken even by you. This is one of the sharpest edges of suffering: the loneliness of feeling abandoned, cut off, forgotten. Show me the loneliness Job names: he feels abandoned by everyone, and even by you. It is not only his losses and his pain that crush him; it is the isolation, the sense of being deserted, a stranger even in his own house. Suffering often brings this loneliness; those in deep pain can feel cut off, forgotten, abandoned, even by you. Job does not hide this raw feeling; he speaks it plainly. Yet his feeling of your abandonment, real as it was, was not the final truth; you had not abandoned him, and would answer him in the end. Let me hold onto that, for even in the loneliness of suffering, when I feel forsaken by all, you have not abandoned me. When I suffer, I can feel the crushing loneliness Job felt, deserted, forgotten, and even, in my anguish, forsaken by you; and the feeling is real and painful. But the feeling of your abandonment is not always the truth; you are often nearest when I feel most alone. When I feel the loneliness of suffering, help me hold onto the truth that you have not abandoned me, Lord, however it feels, for you do not finally forsake your own.