2 Samuel 14:18-22: a reflection

18Then the king answered the woman, “Please don’t hide anything from me that I ask you.” The woman said, “Let my lord the king now speak.” 19The king said, “Is the hand of Joab with you in all this?” The woman answered, “As your soul lives, my lord the king, no one can turn to the right hand or to the left from anything that my lord the king has spoken; for your servant Joab urged me, and he put all these words in the mouth of your servant. 20Your servant Joab has done this thing to change the face of the matter. My lord is wise, according to the wisdom of an angel of God, to know all things that are on the earth.” 21The king said to Joab, “Behold now, I have granted this thing. Go therefore, and bring the young man Absalom back.” 22Joab fell to the ground on his face, showed respect, and blessed the king. Joab said, “Today your servant knows that I have found favor in your sight, my lord, O king, in that the king has performed the request of his servant.”

A wise woman comes to King David with a moving story, pleading a case, and David, perceptive, senses something beneath it. Is the hand of Joab with you in all this? he asks. And she admits it: yes, Joab put these words in my mouth; he staged this whole thing to move you. David had discerned that the woman's emotional appeal was actually a scheme, orchestrated by his commander Joab to maneuver him into a decision. He saw through the staged performance to the hand behind it.

Notice David's discernment. He did not simply take the woman's touching story at face value and react as intended; he sensed the manipulation, perceived the orchestrating hand behind the emotional appeal, and named it. And notice, too, the flattery woven in: the woman praises David as wise as an angel of God, knowing all things, part of the effort to move him. David is being both manipulated and flattered, and he sees through both to what is really happening.

That is a discernment worth asking God for. We are often the targets of manipulation and flattery, appeals crafted to move us, emotional performances staged to steer our decisions, praise deployed to soften us up. It is easy to be swept along, taking the performance at face value, flattered into compliance. David's example commends a wiser watchfulness: to sense the hand behind the appeal, to not be swept away by an emotional case or disarmed by flattery, to ask what is really going on. Ask God for discernment to see through manipulation and flattery, and not to be steered by staged appeals into decisions you would not make with clear eyes.

Lord, David discerned the manipulating hand of Joab behind a moving appeal, and was not swept away by the story or disarmed by flattery. Give me that discernment. When I am the target of manipulation and flattery, appeals crafted to move me, praise deployed to soften me, help me sense the hand behind them and not be swept along. Keep me from being steered by staged appeals or flattered into compliance. Give me clear eyes to see what is really going on, and wisdom to decide rightly.