1 Samuel 22:16-23: a reflection

16The king said, “You shall surely die, Ahimelech, you and all your father’s house.” 17The king said to the guard who stood about him, “Turn and kill the priests of the LORD, because their hand also is with David, and because they knew that he fled and didn’t disclose it to me.” But the servants of the king wouldn’t put out their hand to fall on the priests of the LORD. 18The king said to Doeg, “Turn and attack the priests!” Doeg the Edomite turned, and he attacked the priests, and he killed on that day eighty-five people who wore a linen ephod. 19He struck Nob, the city of the priests, with the edge of the sword—both men and women, children and nursing babies, and cattle, donkeys, and sheep, with the edge of the sword. 20One of the sons of Ahimelech the son of Ahitub, named Abiathar, escaped and fled after David. 21Abiathar told David that Saul had slain the LORD’s priests. 22David said to Abiathar, “I knew on that day, when Doeg the Edomite was there, that he would surely tell Saul. I am responsible for the death of all the persons of your father’s house. 23Stay with me. Don’t be afraid, for he who seeks my life seeks your life. You will be safe with me.”

After the priests of Nob unknowingly helped David, the paranoid Saul has them slaughtered, a terrible act carried out by Doeg the Edomite when Saul's own soldiers refuse. Only one priest, Abiathar, escapes and flees to David. And David's response is striking. He does not make excuses; he honestly owns his part: I have occasioned the death of all the persons of your father's house; it was because of me, because I involved you, that this happened. And then he offers Abiathar refuge: Stay with me; do not be afraid; you will be safe with me.

Notice two things David does. First, he takes responsibility. He does not blame only Saul or Doeg, though they did the killing; he honestly acknowledges his own part, that his actions had set in motion the events that led to this tragedy. He owns his responsibility rather than evading it. And second, he offers refuge to the survivor, the one who suffered from what happened, taking Abiathar under his protection, promising him safety.

Both are worth learning. There is an honesty in owning our part in harm that comes to others, even harm we did not directly do, even harm mostly caused by others, rather than evading all responsibility. And there is a grace in caring for those who have suffered, offering what refuge and help we can to those affected by our choices or by the wrongs of others. When you have played a part, even unwittingly, in harm to others, do not evade it; own your part honestly, as David did. And where you can offer refuge, protection, or care to those who have suffered, do so. Take responsibility, and offer refuge; both are marks of an honest and gracious heart.

Lord, when the priests of Nob were slaughtered, David honestly owned his part, that his actions had set the tragedy in motion, and he offered refuge to the survivor: stay with me; you will be safe. Give me that honesty and that grace. When I have played a part, even unwittingly, in harm that comes to others, keep me from evading all responsibility or blaming only others; help me own my part honestly, as David did. And where I can offer refuge, protection, or care to those who have suffered, whether from my choices or others' wrongs, help me do so. Make me one who takes responsibility rather than evading it, and who offers shelter to the hurting. Give me an honest and gracious heart, quick to own my part and quick to protect the vulnerable.