Scripture Daily

Context No. 1732 of 4322 · 2 Samuel

Context · Reflection

2 Samuel 13:23-28: in context

23After two full years, Absalom had sheep shearers in Baal Hazor, which is beside Ephraim; and Absalom invited all the king’s sons. 24Absalom came to the king and said, “See now, your servant has sheep shearers. Please let the king and his servants go with your servant.” 25The king said to Absalom, “No, my son, let’s not all go, lest we be burdensome to you.” He pressed him; however he would not go, but blessed him. 26Then Absalom said, “If not, please let my brother Amnon go with us.” The king said to him, “Why should he go with you?” 27But Absalom pressed him, and he let Amnon and all the king’s sons go with him. 28Absalom commanded his servants, saying, “Mark now, when Amnon’s heart is merry with wine; and when I tell you, ‘Strike Amnon,’ then kill him. Don’t be afraid. Haven’t I commanded you? Be courageous, and be valiant!”

Two full years have passed since Amnon violated his half-sister Tamar, and her brother Absalom has said nothing, biding his time. Now Absalom holds a sheepshearing feast and invites all the king's sons, pressing his father David until Amnon too is allowed to come. And Absalom instructs his servants: when Amnon is merry with wine and I give the word, strike him down; do not be afraid, for I have commanded you. So the long-nursed revenge is carried out.

What is chilling in this account is the patience of the hatred. Absalom did not strike in the heat of the moment; he waited two full years, saying nothing, letting his hatred for Amnon settle and harden into a cold, deliberate plan. All that time the grudge lived in him, nursed in silence, waiting for its opportunity; and when the moment came, the revenge was carried out with calm calculation. This is what harbored bitterness can become. A wrong done to us, or to those we love, can lodge in the heart and, if we nurse it rather than release it, curdle over time into something settled and cold, a grudge that waits and plots. Absalom's two years of silence were not forgiveness; they were the slow work of a hatred maturing toward revenge. And the revenge, once taken, did not heal anything; it added a murder to the original crime, and set in motion further ruin that would eventually consume Absalom himself. There is a warning here against the nursing of grudges and the taking of vengeance into our own hands. Bitterness held and fed does not stay still; it grows, hardens, and looks for its chance to strike, and when it does, it multiplies the evil rather than ending it. Scripture's counsel runs the other way: do not avenge yourselves, but leave it to God, who judges justly. The wrong done to Tamar was real and grievous; but Absalom's cold, patient revenge was not justice, and it began a chain of sorrow. Harbored bitterness curdles into destruction; the safer and better way is to release the wrong to God rather than nurse it toward vengeance.

Is there a wrong I am nursing in silence, a grudge I am letting harden over months or years into something cold and settled, waiting for its chance, and can I heed the warning of Absalom's patient revenge to release the wrong to God rather than nurse bitterness toward a vengeance that only multiplies the harm?

Sources