Matthew 26:35-39: in context

Peter has just boasted that he will die rather than deny his Lord, and all the disciples say the same. Then Jesus comes to Gethsemane, and begins to be deeply sorrowful and troubled. My soul is sorrowful, he tells Peter, James, and John, even to death; stay here and watch with me. And going a little farther, he falls on his face and prays: my Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not what I desire, but what you desire.

In Gethsemane we are given a window into how to pray when what God asks is hard, and it holds two things together that we might think opposites. On one hand, Jesus prays with complete honesty about his own desire: if it is possible, let this cup pass from me. He does not hide his anguish or pretend he wants the suffering; he asks, plainly and from the depths, to be spared it. His prayer is not a serene acceptance that suppresses all feeling; it is an honest cry, wrung out of real sorrow and dread, that the cup might pass. On the other hand, he yields entirely to the Father's will: nevertheless, not what I desire, but what you desire. The honest request is real, and so is the submission; he brings his true longing to God, and then surrenders it to the Father's will above his own. This is the pattern of prayer for our own hard askings. We are sometimes taught, wrongly, that faith means not asking for what we want, or pretending we are fine with the suffering; and sometimes we swing the other way, demanding our will and refusing God's. Gethsemane shows a truer way: to bring our real desire and our real anguish honestly to God, asking, even pleading, for the cup to pass, and then to yield it to his will, saying, nevertheless, not my will but yours. We may ask for the hard thing to be taken away; Jesus did. And we may, like him, hold that request open-handed before the Father, surrendering it to a will and wisdom higher than our own. The honesty and the submission belong together: to pour out our true desire, and to yield it to God. Let this cup pass, Jesus prayed, and in the same breath, your will be done. That is how the faithful pray when the cup is bitter.

When God asks of me something hard, do I either suppress my true desire in a false serenity or demand my own will against his, or can I pray as Jesus prayed in Gethsemane, bringing my real anguish and longing honestly to God, let this cup pass, and yet yielding it to him, not my will but yours?